Greatest Cameras Man

Now days, many people are into photography as hobby or as their full time job. Of course photography is very fun when you are having the most advance and latest model of the gears.

There are so many types of camera man or so called photographer, it's depend on your budget to play on it. Some people like all the gears out for photo shoot, some will just bring minimum gears which he/she feels good enough for the photo shoot topic.

I used to bring whatever I have for every outing, but after some time I felt it's a waste of energy to carry so much unnecessary weight. Now I just bring minimum gear which I feel it's good enough to shoot what I wanted, that's the learning process.

Yesterday I received an email from my friend on amazing scenes that showed special moment that we rarely see in our life... and I found out one of the pictures very shocked me...

CameraS Man!

I was laughing non-stop when look at it, I wonder how he runs if any emergency. From my observation to count on the gears he has, I estimated the total value can buy me a house! I'm not that greedy, if I can owned any one of his gears, I'll happy till I cry!

Super Cameras Man!
WAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

Earth Hour Photo

On 27th March 2010, whole world is celebrating Earth Hour by switching off all lights for 1 hour. So what was the main purpose of having this kind of event? At first the main objective is to save our planet from global warming for cut down the usage of power or energy.

I was just wondering, since the campaign is to save the energy usage, but why still got so many insists to take more pictures by using DSLR? Since everyone is so keen to snap the moment, here I presenting you my so called BEST EVER photo I took in my entire life...

Earth Hour Photo

Since all switched off the light, what do you expect? That's the picture outcome I can get!

I think the campaign is a bullshit! Since they wanted to save the energy usage, but why still insists to take photos? DSLR no need power to operate? I wonder which manufacture can produce a DSLR can operate without battery like old type fully manual SLR.

Another thing, after snap the picture, how are you going to see it and publish it? You still need a computer to do it right? Somemore editing... All these need power supply to do it!

Furthermore so many participants light up with candle, hello! Candle burning produce Carbon Monoxide ok? Is that the correct way to save the planet? How about the T-Shirt printing? Brochure printing, are these all no need power at all? After the campaign what will these things do? In the rubbish dump? Or on every streets?

Some still have live telecast on this event, hello! Live telecast no need power is it? Many will switched off the light, but still left the fan or air-conditional on with full blast, so what is the objective?

For my view, if really want to do it, just do it properly, turn off everything, no need any big gathering or special event in particular place. All you need is just TURN OFF the main distribution switch in your premises, turn off your mobile, turn off your engine and go to sleep!

Earth Hour?

Tripod

Note: This article taken from my email. I was laughing like hell in the end and wanted to share with you all this creative joke to lighten up your gloomy Sunday and lazy Monday.

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The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family.

On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife goodbye and said, "Well, I'm off now; The man should be here soon."

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.

Good morning, Ma'am", he said, "I've come to...'

'Oh, no need to explain," Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, "I've been expecting you."

"Have you really?" said the photographer. "Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?"

"Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat"

After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?"

"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there."

"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!"

"Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results."

"My, that's a lot!" gasped Mrs. Smith.

"Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but I' m sure you'd be disappointed with that."

"Don't I know it," said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus," he said.

"Oh my God!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

"And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with. "She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.

"Yes, I'm afraid so I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look."

"Four and five deep?" said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.

"Yes", the photographer replied. "And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots.

Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in."

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?"

"It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away."

"Tripod?"

"Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long."

Mrs. Smith fainted...

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*I think the photographer must be using Canon EOS 1Ds Mark III*

WAKAKAKAKAKA!!!!

How to Go to Work Happily?

Are you satisfy with your current job? Are you happy to go to work everyday? I guess majority of you all are not that happy to go to work, included myself.

Even if you are workaholic doesn't mean you are happy with your job, unless the job you doing now is what you wanted or part of your hobbies.

So how you can make yourself happy when go to work? Now I found this comic from my email which is very usefull to everyone to make yourself 'look' happy to go work.

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Work Happily

I think I need to ask one of steel fabricators to fabricate this device for me...

Happy To Work?

Cool Designations

Note: This article taken from my email. It's about construction field's designations from every level. I found it very funny and just to share with you all.

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Designations & It's meaning

Project Manager:
Is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in one month.

Construction Manager:
Is one who thinks a single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.

Contract manager:
Is one who asks if the baby is in the budget (and if it saves money to adopt).

Project Engineer:
Is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby if no man and woman are available.

Section Engineer:
Is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a baby.

Design Engineers:
Are still figuring out how to produce a baby.

Procurement Team:
Thinks they don't need a man or woman; they'll produce a child with zero resources.

Document Control Team:
Thinks they don't care whether the child is delivered they'll just document 9 months.

Quality Auditor:
Is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to produce a baby.

Site Engineers:
Don't care...they just want the woman!!!

Client:
Is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.

Last but not Least...

QUANTITY SURVEYOR:
Is the one who wait for the baby to be delivered, so that they can make claim to be its Father

WAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

Missing Foundation

Can anyone tell me how to build a building without foundation? Or can anyone build a building first then only build the foundation? I'm not joking, I mean it's a real building, not a simple dog house which no need foundation.

Even for all who are not in construction field also can understand, any building must start from foundation. Here I got a sample picture taken from my email some time ago, I don't know where is that place and I also don't know who is the designer and builder.

Where is the foundation?

When I saw this picture, I really salute to the designer and builder, they really can did it without foundation! I think I better change my major to other fields...

WAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

Greatest F1 Driver

Formula One season has been started since a week ago in Australia, everyone who like Formula One racing sport should very excited to follow up every race result, I'm one of them as I love Formula One since I was 7 years old (no joke!).

Currently I'm involving in the construction of Abu Dhabi F1 - YAS Marina Circuit, I'm really glad that I'm in the project as I love this sport very much. Right now we have to push beyond the limit to achieve the opening target date (1 Nov 2009).

Everybody is talking who is the greatest F1 driver so far? Well... It's obviously majority will say Michael Schumacher, Ayrton Senna, Alain Prost... and many more. For this generation we can see many great drivers has born in this racing sport, but nobody know that the most latest greatest F1 drivers are goes to...

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The Greatest F1 Drivers Are:
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I'm at the far right touching the tyre

I'm one of the Greatest F1 Drivers lor... Don't believe? see... I'm featured in Racing Circuit Dubai magazine front page wor... Somemore under Team Williams, don't play play har... Just a friendly reminder, don't test me on the road because I'm a responsible driver that's why I'm a greatest driver... Wakakakaka!!!

I'm Greatest F1 Driver!!!

.....in my dream la.....

New Witch Arrived?

One day, I was having a short break with my colleagues, suddenly I saw a very special thing fell from sky.

I told my colleagues... 'Hey guys... Look! An upgraded witch is coming!!!' Everybody were looking around and asked me... 'Where? Where? Where? Then I pointed to the direction... Then everybody were laughing like hell.

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New Witch with bicycle?

I wonder who tide the sweeper like that on the bicycle and for what purpose? Maybe that fella wants to sweep people away when he takes corner?

WAKAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

Funny Words

This few days I wanted to familiar my new project in Abu Dhabi (F1), so my colleagues brought me to site visit to know more about site conditions.

I found out some signages were so funny with wrong spelling. I manage to snap one of it, I told my colleagues than only they realised the mistake has been made by others, everyone were laughing so loud on it...

Guard Room or Gurd Room?

I can see all the guard rooms has been written as 'Gurd Room', after I told all, everybody were laughing till forgot their tension on work. I also saw another wrong spelling on 'Foreman' became 'Fourman', I really have lots of big laugh during my site visit with my colleagues, most of them are big time jokers too, I really started enjoying to work here now. Now I believe the wrong spelling or words not only happened in China which everyone has making the big laugh on it, I think it happens everywhere.

Just now I was talk cock with my colleague about funny words, then he came out with one country name which I was laughing till my tear came out. He said 'Singapura' (Singapore in English) that in Malay word meaning is Singa-Pura, that mean in Chinese word is '狮子假装' and in English is 'Lion Pretend'.

I think most of us work until crazy, when all together talk cock sure everyone were laughing non-stop to forget all the pressure / tension on work. I think it is a good way to release our tension rather than doing unhealthy activities.

Anyway, I will be more in office work to sort out all QAQC matters than working on site, actually I prefer to work both sides (Office & Site), but there are so many Architectural material matters need to be sorted out in site office, so the management wanted me to sort it out in order to make sure site works are working smooth.

WAKAKAKAKAKA!!!!

Super Jump Queue

We always can see how people jump queue to enter a bus, today I discover best ever jump queue to enter a bus at my working site. A group of Chinese workers from China shown how clever they jump queue on a bus.

Super Jump Queue

Some workers were climbing into the bus via window. I wonder what so rush to them, normally I can heard group of workers roaring and shouting to get a seat in a bus to go back to their labour camp. So many accidents happened before just because everyone were rushing to enter a bus.

Super Jump Queue!

New Look Alike

We always can see someone look alike with someone, even myself, wherever I go, sure must have someone said I look like someone they met before.

Recently I discovered someone my favorite legendary guitarist look alike our Malaysia Prime Minister! He is Jimmy Page the lead guitarist from legendary rock band, Led Zeppelin.

I wasn't on time to watch the closing ceremony of Beijing Olympic 2008, I was on my way back to Penang from Kuala Lumpur during my short holiday in Malaysia. So I search the video clip on it, then when I watched the video clip, Jimmy Page really looks like our Pak Lah!!! I showed the video to my colleagues, all of them also agreed he does looks like our Pak Lah, even my mom also said so...

Let's have a look on Jimmy Page during his performance in the closing ceremony of Beijing Olympic 2008...

Jimmy Page (present day)

Jimmy Page performed with Leona Lewis in closing ceremony of Beijing Olympic 2008

Jimmy Page (old days) with Led Zeppelin

So... Do you agree he really looks like Pak Lah? At first I was surprise since when Pak Lah so rock playing the guitar, then when I see properly, it was Jimmy Page! I can't believe he changed so much in his old age.

The snap shots may not look so alike, but if you watch the video clip, he really looks like Pak Lah.

Malaysia Prime Minister, Abdullah Badawi

Jimmy Page Still Rocks!!!

Maths At Work

Note: This post was taken from my email, I found it's so funny and just to share with you all.

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Equation 1

Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
Donkey = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Human = Donkey + work + enjoy

Therefore,
Human - enjoy = Donkey + work

In other words,
Human that don't know enjoy = Donkey that work

Equation 2

Men = eat + sleep + earn money
Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Men = Donkeys + earn money

Therefore,
Men - earn money = Donkeys

In other words,
Men that don't earn money = Donkeys

Equation 3

Women = eat + sleep + spend
Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Women = Donkeys + spend

Therefore,
Women - spend = Donkeys

In other words,
Women that don't spend = Donkeys

To Conclude:

From Equation 2 and Equation 3
Men that don't earn money = Women that don't spend.

So, Men earn money not to let women become Donkeys! (Postulate 1)

And, Women spend not to let men become Donkeys! (Postulate 2)

So, we have?
Men + Women = Donkeys + earn money + Donkeys + spend money

All Donkeys!!!
WAKAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

Follow Construction Drawings

Note: Received the pictures via my email. For those who in construction or engineering field will understand it well.

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Normally any revised drawings, the engineer or designer will cloud the part which need to be amended. This contractor really drilled a hole exactly from drawing...

The drilling hole so nice

Sometimes, the indication or marking on a drawing also confusing to those contractor who don't really understand on it...

Drawing

The contractor really wrote it at the staircase, the landing step also follow the drawing line... LOL

Sometimes you cannot blame the contractor, because some consultants are not good in design drawing which caused confusion to others.

I really salute to the contractor who followed the construction drawing 100%, this contractor should be awarded 'Best Contractor of The Year'...

WAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

Why Chinese Shouldn't Have English Name?

Note: Received this joke via my email, I know most of you had read it before, but I just wanted to share with you all, this jokes really cheer up my tension day from work.

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Read in Mandarin:

Anne Chang
- Dirty

Anne Chin
- Keep quiet

Faye Chen
- Dusty

Jane Tan
- Frying eggs

Henry Mah
- Hate your mum

Paul Chan
- Bankrupt

Nelson Tan
- Bird laying eggs

Read in Hokkien:

Carl Cheng
- Buttock

Monica Cheng
- Touching your buttocks

Lucy Leow
- You are dead

Lucy Seow
- You are mad

Suzie Leow
- Lose (money) till death

Corrine Tai
- Poor fellow

Carmen Tng
- Leg hair long

Rosie Teng
- Screws and nails

Pete Tsai
- Nose droppings

Read in Cantonese:

Macy Koh
- Never die before

Lynn Tai
- Big breasts

Faye Chee
- Fat pig


WAKAKAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

Secret of Men to Live Longer

Note: Received this article via my email, just wanted to share with you guys all how we can live longer. I not sure it's true or not, let's try it up my fellows!!!

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So guys... are this statements good for us to see more?

So girls... please don't misunderstand, we MEN want to live more longer!!!

I think this post really crap... anyway, I'm really crap and hamsap (pervert) too, I just a normal MAN in this world.

Let's Keep On Staring!!!

Born In 50's, 60's & 70's

Note: This article was taken from my email, I found it so true about it and just wanted to share with you all... Anyway, this post is something similar like my first ever post of my blog about For 70's Babies.

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TO ALL THE THOSE WHO WERE BORN IN THE 50's and 60's & '70s............

First, we survived with mothers who had no maids. They cooked /cleaned while taking care of us at the same time. (My mom did so...)

They took aspirin, candy floss, fizzy drinks, shaved ice with syrup and diabetes was rare. Salt added to Pepsi or Coke was remedy for fever. (I did that...)

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets, not to mention... (Hehe... It's true)

As children, we would ride with our parents on bicycles/ motorcycles for 2 or 3. Richer ones in cars with no seat belts or air conditioner. (My dad got no car, so the motorcycle one is true)

Riding in the back of a private taxi was a special treat. (Never took a private taxi till I come out for work)

We drank water from the tap and NOT from a bottle. (Mine from well lor)

We would spend hours on the fields under bright sunlight flying our kites, without worrying about the UV ray which never seemed to affect us. (Yeah!)

We went into jungle to catch spiders without worries of Aedes mosquitoes. (Yalor...)

With mere 5 pebbles (stones) would be a endless game. With a ball (tennis ball best) we boys would run like crazy for hours. (Mine is marble balls/guli)

We caught guppy in drains / canals and when it rained we swam there. (No rain also gone down la)

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually worried about it being unhygenic. (Errr... I think so)

We ate salty, very sweet & oily food, candies,bread and real butter and drank very sweet strong coffee/ tea, ice kacang, but we weren't overweight because...... (I also don't know why)

WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!! (This one really true la)

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, till streetlights came on. (Then kena caned like hell lor)

No one was able to reach us all day. No handphones to keep tag on us And we were O.K. (Haha... yalor)

We would spend hours repairing our old bicycles and wooden scooters out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem. (I did that too...)

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, multiple channels on cable TV, DVD movies, no surround sound, no phones, no personal computers, no Internet.WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them! (That's right!)

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and we still continued the stunts. (I did that until graduated from high school)

We were never birthday partied till we were 21. (I never celebrate at all)

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and just yelled for them! (Ah Beng! Ah Tu! Ah Kow!!! Something like that...)

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law! (Hehe... yeah...)

Yet this generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever! (I agree!)

The past 40years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. (That's the facts!)

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned...

HOW TO

DEAL WITH IT
ALL!

And YOU are one of them!

CONGRATULATIONS!

You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the government regulated our lives for our own good.

...and while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were. (I still don't have own family la... but will show to my kids if I got)

-END-

I really feel that age is catching up... I really miss my childhood life, but life goes on I'm looking forward to it, I just have to spend more longer time to achieve my goals compare to others who had achieved it from my era.

Life Goes On...

Take 5

Note: Sorry for lack of update and lack of blog hopping now days. I'm really busy with works, cooking after work, and very tired after dinner everyday. Here I found another great jokes from my email to share with you all.

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Q: What is the closest thing similar to a woman's period?
A: Your salary, it comes once a month lasts about 5-7 days and if it doesn't come means you are in big trouble.

Q: What three things are common between the sun and woman's underwear?
A: Both are hot, both look better while going down and both disappear at night.

Q: Why do men ask for a woman's hand in marriage?
A: Because they are tired of using their own.

Q: What's common between men and video?
A: Both go backward... forward... backward... forward... backward.... forward... stop and eject.

Q: What goes in dry, comes out wet, and gives warm satisfaction?
A: A teabag.

Q: What is the similarity between men and rats?
A: Both keep searching for new HOLES.

Q: What's the difference between biology and sociology?
A: When the baby looks like his dad, then it is biology. When the baby looks like the neighbour, then it is sociology.

Q: Girl friend & boy friend go for a movie. In the dark, a mosquito enters the girl's skirt. Guess where it would have bitten?
A: The boy's hand.

Q: Tarzan and the animals went to the river to take a bath. Tarzan removed his clothes. All the animals laughed. Tarzan asked "Why"?
A: The animals told him..........."Your tail is in the front".

Doctor: You look so weak & exhausted. Are you having 3 meals a day as I have advised?
Lady: Doctor, I thought you had said 3 males a day.

7 qualities to be a perfect wife:
Beautiful,
Responsible
Energetic
Adorable
Sweet
Truthful and
Self-Organized.
In short, she must have good B.R.E.A.S.T.S

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Have a nice day to everyone.

WAKAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

Deadlock In Life?

Note: This article was taken from my email, I found it quite interesting and just want to share with you all.

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Boss says to secretary: 'We will go abroad on business for a week, so please make arrangement.'

Secretary makes call to Husband: 'For a week my boss and I will be going abroad, you look after yourself.'

Husband makes call to secret lover: 'My wife is going abroad for a week, so let's spend the week together. '

Secret lover makes call to a small boy whom she is giving private tuition: 'I am not free for a week, so you need not come for tuition. '

Small boy makes call to his grandfather: 'Grandpa, I don't have tuition for a week because my teacher is busy. Let's spend the week together. '

Grandpa(the 1st boss) makes call to his secretary: 'Now I am going to spend time with my grandson, so please postpone that overseas meeting.'

Secretary makes call to her husband: 'My boss has just cancelled our trip.'

Husband makes call to secret lover: 'We cannot spend this week together, my wife has cancelled her trip.'

Secret lover makes call to the small boy: 'This week we will have tuition as usual.'

Small boy makes call to his grandfather: 'Grandpa, my teacher said this week I have to attend class. Sorry I can't accompany you.'

Grandpa makes call to his secretary: 'Don't worry, this week we will attend that overseas meeting, so please make arrangement.'

This is called deadlock in life.

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So... I think this could be happened in this world, do you agree?

Ngek Ngek Ngek!!!

NO!!! You Do It!!!

Dogs always is our best friend, I do believe dogs has human being. Anyway, some dogs are very fierce, if a dog is well-trained it will be different, they can help us in such many ways.

For a detective dog, it helps cops or soldiers to find suspects or victims when it needs. Normally cops need some guides from a detective dog to find a suspect based on any evidences left at the scene.

Here I found a detective dog which is smart enough to react to an evidence left at the crime scene...

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What you want me to do?!

Look at the dog's face, it's really priceless and I was laughing damn loud when I look at the picture.

Human best friend has his limits too...

*p/s: Picture above was taken from my email.

WAKAKAKAKAKAKAKA!!!

It's Time To Ask Salary Raise

Note: This joke was taken from my email, I was having a great laugh when I read about it, so here I just want to share with you all.

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The Day the Penis asked for a Raise:

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:

I do physical labour.

I work at great depths.

I plunge headfirst into everything I do.

I do not get weekends or public holidays off.

I work in a damp environment.

I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.

I work in high temperatures.

My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

Sincerely,

P. Niss

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The Response:

Dear P. Niss,

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised,

The administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

You do not work 8 hours straight.

You fall asleep after brief work periods.

You do not always follow the orders of the management team.

You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.

You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.

You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.

You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing.

You will retire well before you are 65.

You are unable to work double shifts.

You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed your assigned task.

And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

Sincerely,

V. Gina

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So guys, we have to work hard as usual, we really have a hard time all the time. Anyway, my 'little bro' is not eligible to ask anything more because my 'little bro' still haven't start his 1st job till now...

WAKAKAKAKAKA!!!